motetus

Most people upon being told "knit me a goat cunningly disguised as a woolly mammoth!" would probably treat it as the joke it was entirely intended to be. But then,

demon_rum is not most people.

This is Hardy the Goat (shush, he came pre-named). Hardy the Goat is a normal goat, who likes to eat things/poop/cause trouble while being adorable. He also has a special hobby.

Hardy the Goat likes to cosplay as a Woolly Mammoth.

Apologies for the truly awful iPad photos, my camera is missing its battery. It looks even more amazing in person. The mammoth disguise is fully removable, and the fuzzy hide is made from buffalo fur yarn!

demon_rum, I don't know what to say. I don't think I'll ever know what to say. "Thank you, I will love him forever" and "you are an utterly brilliant, slightly insane, ridiculously talented person" seem like such an understatement, but they'll have to do for now.

MY GOAT. MY MAMMOTHGOAT. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Once upon a time, a discussion about dwarf mammoths quickly led to me drawing a ridiculous cracky prehistoric-Eagle AU. Then I thought "well, thank god I won't be drawing anything that stupid again."

HA.

You see,

demon_rum then went on to write the story of Mrc and Esc to go with it, a marvellous monosyllabic tale of thumping baby animals (and boyfriends) over the head with clubs and mammoth grease making an effective lubricant. And then she wrote prehistoric hurt/comfort. And then a story about caveman arguments, after which she demanded more art from me. "No," I said. "I am very busy with my masters thesis, and anyway, wasn't that last story a lesson written for me about the dangers of procrastination- OH FINE THEN."

So I painted this. It is an illustration for the caveman arguments fic - Mrc has come back to the cave after spending the night in a tree, in the rain, with his pet Smilodon, and he and Esc are making up. Oh god, I am so embarrassed by how silly this. Especially by how what was supposed to be a quick little drawing somehow mutated into quite a huge detailed painting. WAS NOT INTENTIONAL. I just hope I atoned for all the stupidity with the tiny, tiny loincloths!

Many many thanks to

sibila_cantus for all her help with my silly anatomy mistakes and making this Not Suck!

Mrc is sad. Esc is sad. Cat is mad!

( Here, have some close-ups too, because I spent way too much time painting hair with a 3-pixel brush )

And should you still not be sick of cavemen by now,

demon_rum has written yet more emo cavemen and interior decoration fluff. She's a terrible person.

I could spend my entire life drawing nothing but the most beautiful, magnificent, explicit gay porn, and still all I'd be known for would be this stupid duck. WHY DIDN'T I JUST DRAW SERVIUS PLACIDUS' GIANT THROBBING UNDERWATER ERECTION?

On Friday I had the creature known as

ainsoph15 turn up on my doorstep bearing cupcakes and a certain Pleistocene mammal*, and therefore I had the task of keeping her fed and watered and entertained for the weekend. For the first I had toad-in-the-hole (now with extra batter!), for the second gin and tea and port, and for the third I dragged her to the university museum, mainly because I thought it was finally time I said a proper hello to the T-rex skeleton I walk past every day on the way to work. One of these days I will go back there again with my camera to document the sarcophagi of these two ancient Egyptians buried in the same tomb who were totally gay for each other (names suggested they were brothers but they were very clearly not, and they were buried with little dolls inscribed with each other's name. Aww!), but the point of this post is what we found in the museum gift shop.

Paint-your-own rubber duckies.

Yes. Fabric store for supplies, back home, stayed up late (and this morning) trying not to accidentally drink the paint water instead of our G&Ts and sever arteries with aluminium shards and nails and needles. So uh, say hello to Centurion Ducky and his little Brigantes friend, everyone.

( More photos! )

So, I had this big box turn up in the post today with a German sender's address I recognised, and inside was...

:D

Thank you SO MUCH,

the_little_owl! What a lovely, lovely surprise it and the very sweet card was (took me a while to spot the card as I was so busy squealing over the mammoths!), THANK YOU! :D You have no idea how happy this has made me - you really are the most awesome species of owl. Little baby mammoth is now making friends with

temve's Galactic Heroes Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon and Darth Maul, while I have daddy mammoth at the corner of my computer, bellowing at me to keep working on the thesis. He looks very intimidating with his trunk up and mouth open!

Now, all I need is 6-inch-tall Esca and Marcus in skimpy loincloths. Wait, maybe not Esca. NO ESCA, YOU CANNOT KILL MY BABY MAMMOTH AND FEED HIM TO YOUR BOYFRIEND.

Current Mood: thankful

OMG. The great Holy Sky Baby-Mammoth has heard my prayers and entreaties and in His glorious wisdom sent His servants

temve and

demon_rum to do His bidding and write Stone Age Esca/Marcus fic. Isn't he the bestest and cutest deity ever?

Manbeast Song by

temve - Dark and disturbing in the way that the Tem does best (warning: death and cannibalism). The perfect antidote for the schmoop I served up last night.

Mrc and Esc: Hunt, Eat, Rut by

demon_rum - What happens to the baby mammoths. Has probably the greatest love-making scene you have ever, or will ever read. So tender, so romantic, so beautifully written.

I love both you guys, I really do. ♥

Oh you guys, I am so ashamed. There was something about Star Wars that made me draw sexualised!Jar Jar fanart and stuff with the most disturbing pairings I could come up with, and that was pretty awful, but even that was better than this nauseatingly sappy baby animal obsession.

Um... here's more Marcus cuddling fluffy baby creatures. Fluffy baby dwarf mammoths. As a caveman. This is all

carmarthen and

the_little_owl's fault, I swear.

( Happy Gay Prehistoric Farmers. Herders. Whatever. )

Entries tagged with you like mammoth?

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Everything IS better with mammoths

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READY THE SICK-BAGS

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